Are Children Too Sexually Aware?
June 29, 2009 by Karlynn Johnston
Filed under Super Informed
I often worry about the effect that the media is going to have on my childrens perception of sex . .This is a good snippet article, but my main worry is not that my children know about sex young, because sex is a normal part of life, big deal, but I worry that they are getting a skewed perception of it. The role models for relationships out there aren’t exactly prime material (aka Chris Brown and Rhianna, lets solve an argument with our fists and hit a woman) or moronic TV commercials where one man is being pursued by a hundred salivating women because of his cologne . I completely agree that a comprehensive sex-education program will give them the information they need to make decisions based on fact, and help them navigate safely armed with the facts, not fiction, or even complete denial, like the abstinence only programs. The author also has an excellent point in mentioning that our son’s sexual morality is almost never an issue in the news, and she is right, when is the last time you read a news article on that topic?
Read the original article here:
Many hip parents have confessed when they see their young daughter dressed in little wisps of clothing, gyrating in front of the TV while singing along with the Britney Spears song If you seek Amy, it gives them pause. I often hear comments such as, “I don’t want to be a prude, but it’s really unnerving to see her be so sexual.”
I sincerely appreciate how difficult it is to watch your child try-on their sexuality — especially when it’s so in-your-face.
Yet, it’s probably the same way your parents fretted when you listened to Madonna, Led Zeppelin, Elvis or whatever music or movie you were into at the time.
Kids figuring out their sexuality is an age-old parent/teenager dilemma.
It certainly doesn’t help that at least once a year, headlines blare about the latest thing that will compromise your daughter’s sexual morality. (Please note: there’s rarely anything in the news about your son’s sexual morality. Is it just me, or is there something fundamentally wrong here?)
To get a balanced perspective, I spoke with sexologist Brian Parker, PhD, who has been teaching sex education in high schools and universities for many years. I asked him if kids are more sexual and/or more sexually active than they were 10 years ago.
He replied with an emphatic no, adding: “Studies show today’s teenagers are no more sexually active than teenagers of the last few decades. The average age of first intercourse is 16.”
Parents would undoubtedly argue that we are living in a hyper-sexualized society. That kids have more access to sexual information than any generation before them. (By the way, every generation of parent has probably said something similar.)
Parker agrees, and cautions parents about two things. The first is to be age appropriate. “If a seven-year-old is provocatively dancing to Britney Spears, they probably don’t understand what they’re doing. If it’s an eleven-year-old, they probably do. It’s important to ask your child, ‘Why are you doing that?’”
Parker adds a second gem: “During your ongoing conversation about sex, make sure your kids understand what your morals and values are. Don’t assume they will mirror what you want or believe. And don’t just say ‘That’s inappropriate’ — tell your kids why.”
Sex education starts at age zero and goes until your kids are out of your house. You must cram the maximum amount of information into their heads before they turn 13, when their friends become their reference point.
Appreciate that as much as you would like to protect your teenager from getting a sexually transmitted infection, becoming pregnant or earning themselves a bad reputation, they will most likely have sex with or without your knowledge.
Take heart — research proves a comprehensive sex education will keep them safe and help them to make the best choices for themselves, their bodies and sexual self-esteem.
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